The Freemans Go Whole 30

Yesterday was Day 1. Day 1 of 30. The Whole 30. The Golfer and I are doing the program together. Late last summer I attempted to go Paleo (animal and vegetable only diet.) I didn’t last very long. By September, I had chucked my new friend Paleo out the window in favor of a good margarita and some chocolate cake.

For the last 6 months, I’ve been saying, “As soon as the move is over I’m going to get back on track.” Well, the move was over several weeks ago and I still haven’t gotten back on that track.  Then I had lunch with a friend who told me that she was on Day 23 of the Whole 30. She told me all about the program and how she has never felt better in her life. She told me about having energy all day, even in the afternoon when the kids came home. She told me that she sleeps soundly every night and that she’s lost 14 pounds in the process.

She had me at having never felt better.

I had heard of the Whole 30 program when I started going paleo. I came home after lunch, did a little research, bought the book It Starts with Food on my Kindle, and told the Golfer what we were getting ready to do. Yes, if I was doing this, I needed him to do it with me. I knew I would need the support and it would be easier for him to understand if he was going through it too. He was on board without reading a single page of guidelines. This is what we do. I do the research, he does what I tell him to do. This pretty much sums up our marriage.

The Whole 30 in a nutshell: no sugar, dairy, legumes, gluten or alcohol for 30 days. It’s a chance for your body to reset itself. A chance to let your hormones, gut and immune system get back to normal. Legumes, gluten, and alcohol I could easily give up. No dairy or sugar? Well, that was going to be a challenge.

Back to Day 1. We woke up excited to start the program and made a yummy breakfast:

  • scrambled eggs
  • chicken sausage
  • chamomile tea

Was a bummer not having my glass of OJ. I’ve been drinking OJ with breakfast my ENTIRE life. Also skipped my coffee because it’s usually filled with sugar-free creamer and a Splenda.

So far…so good.

10 AM: I was headed off to Whole Foods with my long grocery list from guidelines and recipes from Practical Paleo, the Nom Nom Paleo app, and It Starts with Food. $350 bucks later (gulp) I left Whole Foods hungry, a little lethargic, and irritated that I had just spent so much on groceries that would probably only last me through the week. This program isn’t for wussies, on multiple levels, including your grocery bill.

12 PM: Lunch was some leftover beef and vegetable soup, minus the red potatoes. Was hard not having crackers or some other kind of bread to go with it. Didn’t feel very satisfied when I reached the bottom of the bowl.

So far…I was not loving this.

2 PM: I was hungry. Legitimately hungry. So was the Golfer. And we were both HIGHLY irritable. Yes, we were getting hangry. Had seen a recipe for bacon wrapped pineapple, and since I happened to have both I quickly made them. They were a yummy marriage saving treat.

4 PM: I was hungry again. I grabbed some pistachios. I eat a handful and start to feel lightheaded. It was weird. I drank some water and felt fine. My body wasn’t digging this. I could tell.

6 PM: We were starving so I made dinner quickly. Dinner was some chicken stir fry. Nothing fancy. Nothing especially delicious. No soy sauce allowed. Boring and unsatisfying…again. This wasn’t good. The Golfer, who is used to his evening glass of red wine, just looked at me with sad eyes. This wasn’t going as well as I had hoped for the first day. Wasn’t the first day supposed to be easy? Weren’t we supposed to be on some kind of Whole 30 high? Wasn’t the excitement supposed to last for more than 12 hours? The Golfer looked at me and said, “What the HELL have you gotten us into?!?”

So far…I was hating life.

9 PM: By bedtime, I had a full-blown headache. An entire day of no caffeine and no sugar had finally taken its toll. Was able to go to sleep quickly, but woke up in the middle of the night with a full-blown migraine.

My immediate emotion? Anger.

Anger? Yes, anger. Angry that my body was already having such serious withdrawals that I was in physical pain (it was the kind of a headache that made you sick to your stomach.) Angry that I still had 29 days of this left. The Golfer? He was fine. No issues. Was sleeping soundly. Clearly, I’m the only one completely dependent on sugar and caffeine to survive. Shocker.

Today is Day 2.

So far…we’ll see.

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