Home Goods Happy Husband

It started when I mentioned wanting a reading nook.

“What’s a reading nook,” the husband asked.

“What do you mean ‘what’s a reading nook?’ It’s for reading.” I was already annoyed.

“But what is it?” he asked again.

“It’s a cozy spot to READ. A comfy chair, good lighting, a little table to set your coffee on. You know, a reading nook.” I explained as if speaking to one of our children.

“What’s wrong with the comfy chair that you’re currently sitting in?”He was trying to catch me on a technicality.

“Oh, this won’t work. It’s too close to the T.V.”

“Too close to the T.V.? It’s everything you just described. Table, light, chair. The whole thing.”

“But it’s all in front of the T.V. It’s too tempting. This chair is for watching not reading. I want to be tucked into a little corner with a chair that’s all mine and whose only purpose is to wait for me to come and read in it.”

“Have you been watching HGTV? Does this have something to do with Pinterest? There’s plenty of chairs in this house that would be happy to let you read in them.”

He grinned. He knew what he was doing. He started listing off chairs in different places all over our house. Yes, it was true. There were plenty of chairs in our home, more chairs than we had people to sit in them. Buying a new chair seemed ridiculous, frivolous, stupid, but I couldn’t help myself.

Finally I yelled, “CAN WE JUST GO TO HOME GOODS, PLEASE! Let’s just me look. I just want to look.”

And the husband, being the wonderful guy that he is, agreed to go.

“Better I go with you than not,” he said.

***

Home Goods on a Saturday was probably my first mistake. People were everywhere. I knew I needed to act fast so some other woman didn’t get to my chair first. Was I sure that my reading nook chair was even there? Did I even know what I was really looking for? No, not really. But I sure as hell didn’t want some other woman getting to it first.

There were plenty to choose from. But, much like Goldilocks inspecting and finding wrong with the furniture in the home of the Three Bears, I found wrong with almost every chair in the store.

That chair is too small.

That chair is too big.

That chair is too hard.

That chair is too soft.

It didn’t look like I was going to find it. The store was crowded causing the bargain hunting high to wear off. When I had started to succumb to the fact that we might be leaving the store empty-handed, I saw something.
“Look at that one,” I told the husband.
I was pointing out a chair not for myself, but for him. When I saw it, I instantly knew that he would like it. You see, my husband is a lover of different. He wants the rare things that no one else will have. He doesn’t want them because they are expensive or showy. No, he wants them because they are unique. He loves unique. Part of the reason we named our children what we did was that they weren’t names that you hear every day. And when I saw this chair, that’s exactly what he thought.
“Now there’s a chair you don’t see every day.”
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It was love at first sight. He was grinning from ear to ear and once we saw that it was marked waaaaaaaaay down, well I was almost certain that this chair was going home with us.
“We have to have it! It’s so cool! Don’t you think it’s cool? Where can we put it? Should it go outside? No, it would get ruined outside. Inside. Where can it go inside?”
You know when you take your children shopping and you go looking for one thing and they end of begging for another? And you know how annoyed you are when they do that because that’s not what you came for but their excitement is so pure you can’t help but want to buy it for them just because you know how happy it will make them? Yeah, that’s what this was. This chair was NOT the chair that I came looking for. This wasn’t a reading nook chair. Far from it. But it was clear. We would be going home with this chair.
I tried to hide my disappointment. “Well, that’s not the chair that we came for. But it’s cool. And it’s a good deal. So. Fine. You can have your chair.”
Oh, how happy my husband was. He was the epitome of their slogan. He was indeed “Home Goods Happy.”
I, however, was not. I was not happy. Nowhere close. Wasn’t he just bitching about already having too many chairs in the house? Sure, this chair was cool and different (and quite a bargain) but it would now require a new home in our home. This meant rearranging. I didn’t mind rearranging for a chair for my reading nook. That was totally acceptable. But this? This was just going to annoy me.
Watching the husband proudly parade the chair through the store up to the register, you could see it on his face. His face said to everyone we passed, “Look what I found and you didn’t!” I knew that face. That face is what Home Goods is all about. That is the face of “I got to it first and now it’s mine!” I understood that face and because I myself have had it many times before. I stopped being annoyed. How could I be annoyed when this damn chair clearly made him so happy? Home Goods Happy.
I’ll admit, the chair has grown on me and the new arrangement of the living room furniture looks pretty good. We have named him Mr. Chair (after a reference to one of our favorite T.V. shows.) We’ve had it for a couple of weeks now and no one has sat in Mr. Chair.
“You still haven’t sat in Mr. Chair,” I pointed out to the husband last night.
“I know, but look how cool it is!”
So the next time you come over to our house, and you see a really unique chair that is actually more comfortable than it looks, feel free to comment to my husband, “My what a cool chair you have!” He will beam as if you had just complimented one of our children.
And please, feel free to have a seat. Someone needs to.

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